Day 272 (Saturday 12th) - Moving Again, And A Night In
We had to move again, due to availability - this city is entirely full, it seems. This was fine, as waking up in our chintz-ridden room was horrible today, so we packed up and moved to Jazz Hostel South Beach, and then fled quickly down to a place on Ocean Drive called Johnny Rockets, an agreeable 50s style diner. I had a chili dog, possibly unadvisedly, and we strolled down to the beach for a refreshing dip. It worked, and we instantly felt far better - only for a short time however, as it started to rain very soon after we arrived. This didn't seem to bother most of the people on the beach, most of whom simply covered up their sound systems and waited for the return of the sun. Pat and I decided to go to the cinema, and walked down to Lincoln road, a leafy shopping area up. We had a nice stroll, and spent ages in the Peter Lik gallery (Australian photographer - look him up, he's awesome) before dropping into Banana Republic to get some very un-me clothes for our surprise trip tomorrow. We went to see Hancock, which was really good in spite of itself, if you know what I mean., and finished off the day with a load of Jack Daniels marinaded treats, a bottle of wine, a cocktail and an absurdly big steak sandwich in T.G.I. Friday's. Almost immediately I started feeling really ill, so we headed back to the hostel, which was buzzing with activity. We finished off the whiskey we bought the other night while everyone else drank swiftly as they were all going to a club called Space, on a bus organised by the hostel. We declined that particular option, as we have to be up at 5 tomorrow for our mystery journey.
Day 273 (Sunday 13th) - Miami - Port Lucaya, Grand Bahama
Wow. We were up at 5 am to be picked up by a shuttle bus, on our way to Fort Lauderdale. The guy had managed to overbook and crammed one too many people in for what was a very uncomfortable and bouncy journey. At Fort Lauderdale port we had a very long and very dull hour or two of queuing, going through immigration, getting our tickets, and loads of other unnecessary and inefficient faffing. Our boat departed at 8 - when we booked this trip at the hostel a few days ago, we forgot to ask any important questions, such as the following:
✮Where does it leave from?
✮Where are we going?
✮What kind of boat is it?
✮How long will it take?
✮What season is it in the Bahamas?
Had we known the answers to any of these questions, we might not have been so excited, or indeed booked the trip at all. The answers to the above queries are as follows:
✮Bloody miles away
✮Port Lucaya, a little tourist spot on Grand Bahama island
✮Like a sodding P&O ferry, huge and slow and grim and boring - had the cheek to call itself a cruise
✮5 hours each way, somewhat astonishing as it is only 52 miles off the Florida coast
✮Hurricane season. You would think someone might have mentioned that, maybe?
Our included breakfast buffet was, in a word, awful. We were herded like cattle through the depressing dining room, where we observed loads of fat Americans and Bahamians (as well as some thin ones, but mostly fat) wolfing down plates of things with names like 'grits'. We sat out by the (empty) pool on some sun loungers and tried to have a sleep, but it decided to rain every time we went outside, so this plan was shortlived. We went to the roof later, and the same thing happened, so we hung out in the casino and lost $20 each - annoyingly, this would have been the price of getting a cabin to sleep in for the journey. Our lunch buffet was pretty grim too, further compounding the depression and regret we were experiencing about this whole misadventure. Things only got worse, as it was bucketing down when we arrive din the Bahamas. Our hotel is overpriced and none too good, although I'm sure it would have nice views if it weren't for the rain and clouds. We went down to the beach and ended up having a drink in the Prop Club, attached to the Sheraton-Westin-Casino complex. We then explored Port Lucaya marketplace, and ended up sitting in Rum Runners bar watching the rain coming down for a while. I should mention here that we looked quite a pair, decked out as we were in striped linen shirts and khaki trousers, equipped with a fine Cuban cigar and shades for good measure. We had a few good drinks in Rum Runners, accompanied by Conch fritters (a local speciality). We moved around the marketplace to a few bars while it intermittently pissed down, as we consistently got pissed up. All in all it was really rather quiet, as a consequence of us just missing Bahamian Independence Day, the weather, and it being Sunday night.
Day 274 (Monday 14th) - Port Lucaya, Grand Bahama - Miami
I was up far earlier than I would have liked, and felt rubbish for a while until wonderful Pat went to the shops and got Coke, some kind of Bahamian punch, water, crisps and beef patties for us. We napped for a while and, seeing the weather improve, we went for a wander before noon. The second we closed the door, it started to rain again. We decided not to be perturbed, and went and checked out the casino, where (under my tutelage) Pat managed to win $25 on the slots and $50 on roulette (thanks also to the advice of a short fat woman on the boat). With our winnings we got some hand rolled cigars, intending to just cruise around the beach looking cool, but yet again it decided to pour as soon as we walked outside, so we ended up smoking them under the awning of a closed Chinese restaurant. Classy. It was 1 pm by the time the rain stopped, so we rushed off and paid $70 for half an hour on some jetskis. It was really fun, and we got some impressive air from some of the waves, but it started raining yet again. Not a problem at sea, one might think, but heading into the wind was incredibly painful as the raindrops slammed into your face. Going in the other direction was fine though, and after some racing we followed a glass-bottomed boat and jumped the wake for a bit. With somewhat jarred spines we had to head in - the chaps had decided to give us an hour as they didn't have much business, but this was a problem as we had to get a bus at 2. We ran back through the rain, got the bus, and went through immigration far quicker than on the way our. The rest of the winnings were used to get us a cabin for the journey, in which we dozed and read for a while. We had a gross dinner buffet, which we ate too much of and which I wish I had thrown it up, as we both felt awful afterwards. I object to absorbing this awful stuff, and we decided it could only give us second rate energy. We slept some more and arrived in late but refreshed, and we're now back in the hostel, off to New York tomorrow!
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