Hangover, getting Rich's stuff and a late start.

13/03 - Eugh. I was warned yesterday that Cardinal lager was notorious for giving you a hangover before you have finished drinking it, and the wine we drank yesterday had a cap like a beer bottle, which is never a good sign. Thank god for the metal blinds in my room, keeping the painful sunlight at bay. Rich and I managed to sleep until 11 or so - apparently if I happened to be awake when he woke up in the night, I would greet him with a sleepy "bonjour" and roll over and go back to sleep. We got up and dashed to CERN to try and get Rich's bag back, aiming to get to the locks and keys office before 1230. We arrived at precisely 1229, found the office to be closed, rang the number on the door and were informed that it would be shut until Monday morning. We decided the best thing to do was to go to the locker and see if we could find a way in - we brought tools with us.

When we got to the lockers, we found them all to be open and empty - the one in which Rich had left his stuff now contained just an empty travelex envelope. Rich panicked and looked terrified - all his money and his passport were in the locker. I rang the CERN fire brigade (they are in charge of all emergency services stuff here), who didn't know that the lockers existed, and told us to come over and file a police report with them. We shuffled out of the door, going past the lockers one last time, which is when I noticed a sign on the wall, in four languages, informing us that the lockers were emptied every night and anything left in there could be claimed by phoning security. This sign was right next to the lockers, and in fact they had made use of it yesterday night to find the French word for locker, but had not thought to read the rest of the sign. I rang security and said "Bonjour, parlez-vous Anglais?"

"Non" came the reply. Rich readopted his look of fear, but I ploughed ahead and managed to have a conversation in French, explaining the situation, describing the bag, finding out where it might be, and informing them that we'd be right over. I realised that it was the first time that speaking French was actually important since my AS level oral exam in 2001. We went to the office at Entrance B, and found the bag (all money still present) on a table, I signed for it and we got the hell out of CERN.

We headed back via Mike Wong's, where we had a well-deserved and delicious hangover meal. We went home and had much-needed showers, eventually starting our day in Geneva at 4pm with a walk through the old town down to Eaux-vives, walking out to the Jet D'Eau and getting the boat over to Pâquis. On our way, I stopped to take a picture of a swan and forgot that I had my phone in my hand, and dropped it off a ledge into the lake. A kind gentleman scooped it out immediately, treading in a huge pile of swan crap for his trouble. It worked for a little while, but after about 10 minutes it just showed a white screen. Bugger. As we were feeling fancy,we headed up to the bar atop the Grand Hotel Kempinski, which ended up costing CHF 12 apiece for a coffee and a corona, which hurt a bit. We had a while before dinner, so we took a little walk through the red light district (sleazy but polite would be a good synopsis of that area of Geneva) on our way to Bains des Pâquis for fondue with Dan and his friend Will, which was delicious, and featured a much nicer Chasselas than last night. We headed back home for a sleep before tomorrow's skiing, with a quick stop at Café des Arts for another glass of wine along the way.

Playground on a train, mugged by Teenage Gypsy Mutes, and the beginning of Rich's saga

12/03 - This morning I had the last of the cosmology lectures, and consequently missed half of my meeting (which I can't say I minded). The discussion was mainly about the note we are planning to write, and which bit of it I should do. That decided, I had an awesome Chinese something-or-other for lunch, and went to the Top Reconstruction meeting with Matilde and Jody. I left after an hour or so to await Rich's arrival - he got a bit lost but eventually managed to hop on a CERN shuttle back here. We went for a brief walk about, during which I realised how little I knew about the place, then popped our stuff in a locker and had some beers with Dan, James, Sarah etc. I had to leave at 7 to go to Lausanne, where I was meeting my cousins, Caitlin and Siân - my train was really expensive (CHF 40!) but amazing. It had two floors, lounge areas, a restaurant with table service, a casual bistro area, and really comfortable seats.

Once in Lausanne, I met the twins and got the Metro one stop to Flon - it was a 30 second journey, but seemed worth it considering the incline. I realised quickly that I had gleaned insufficient information from the internet about where to go, as we seemed to be in a massive shopping precinct, and the only available place to go was called 'King Size Pub'. That said, it was decent enough, and had two chaps playing piano who were pretty good. We talked about their time so far in Switzerland; apparently they have had every moment planned out by Romi, a friend of my aunt's, and they had been instructed to be on the 2245 train at the latest. They are 32 years old and quite capable of looking ater themselves, but they weren't even trusted to have a key to the apartment building.

On the way back I was sitting between some rowdy blokes and a load of Chinese teenagers. One of the former begged a cigarette from one of the latter, which he proceeded to smoke on the train in the seat behind me. He clearly enjoyed it, as he was later heard to shout "Hey! Hey China! This cigarette is delicious!" I moved down the train in search of beer, and instead came upon a playground. A sodding playground, with a slide and a climbing frame, all decorated to look like dinosaurs!

Playground on a train!

I was going down the slide when I was approached by two gypsy-looking girls, who couldn't have been more than 13. They presented a form on a clipboard to me, the jist of which was that they were deaf and mute, and I should give them some money. As I was a little merry by this point, I reached into my wallet, expecting to find a CHF 10 note, but could only find a twenty. I decided to give it to them anyway, but after I did so they shook their heads and pointed at all the other alleged donations on the form, writing "CHF 30 MINIMUM" on the side of the page. I showed them that I hadn't got a ten, whereupon they gave me back the twenty and whipped a fifty out of my wallet! I was not best pleased, and ended up snatching the fifty back, leaving the twenty and getting up to leave. I got downstairs as we pulled into Genève, and couldn't find the button to open the door, so the girls reached up and opened it for me. Embarrassing, to be mildly mugged by teenage gypsy mutes and then need their help to get off the train.

While I was in Lausanne, I had received a few phone calls and messages from Rich and co., telling me that he had forgotten the combination to the locker and was there anything I could suggest. I called them to find that they had not opened the locker, containing all Rich's ski gear, money, clothes and passport, and so had left CERN, had pizza and were heading home. Rich and I had been undecided about whether to ski on Saturday or Sunday, but this made the decision for us. I had bought beer and wine in preparation for Rich's visit, so I invited them round to drown his sorrows. We did this quite effectively - Dan Short, Dan Hayden, James, Rich and I made our way through a couple of litres of Chasselas (one of which had a fizziness to it which is not meant to be there) and some beers, before retiring at about 2, Rich and I sleeping in my bed.

Cosmology, Kel's retreat and 'boy girl sex'

10/03 - Another cosmology lecture this morning. I was about 15 minutes late, by which point I had missed the intro and was greeted by 30 minutes of graphs. I understood a lot of it, and it was still good, but not as good as yesterday. Due to lack of choice (honest) I had steak and chips for lunch - way too many chips, no vegetables, overcooked steak. Yum. I feel I started some good work today, at one point having a Skype chat with Ben while having James on iChat, all talking about work stuff. I got the bus at 6 with Dan, but I skipped the all you can eat pizza in favour of an enormous salad, containing goat's cheese, chorizo, avocado, parmesan, sun dried tomato and rocket. All the good things.

Kelly rang and packed at me, as she is going to Austria on her lab retreat tomorrow - this may be great, but will probably be awful. We discussed plans for next weekend, and realised that we can just hire a car here (hopefully taking advantage of Zack's UN discount), and drive pretty much wherever we want in four days. So, this leaves us with some tough decisions to make - to stay with her stepsister in Slovenia? In her aunt's house near Carcassonne? Just drive to Venice/Bologna/Milan and hang out? I am looking forward to this adventure.

11/03 - Well, seems like I was right. Kelly texted me this morning to let me know a few things; firstly that the skilift leading to her accommodation shuts at 3 pm every day, meaning that she is trapped there from then until it opens at 9 in the morning. Secondly, easyjet lost her luggage, meaning she only has the clothes she wore on the plane, which is not much help as it is currently -1º in Innsbruck, which is 1500m below Kelly's mountaintop hideaway. Which is to say, I bet she's really cold. The lecture this morning was good, somehow he managed to fit the terms "boy girl sex" and "foreplay" into his account of the history of the Hubble constant.

The afternoon was odd - I started a few things and almost immediately dropped them, having massive problems concentrating on anything for any period of time. I drank large amounts of citron tea from the machine in my hall, and tried to learn some stuff about statistical analysis, but ended up reading loads of posts by Brian Cox about this ridiculous story. And informing people of the fact that this is actually fine, has been planned for ages, and amounts to no less physics time than if the accelerator ran on its old schedule, with summer and winter shutdowns.

I managed to get the 1801 bus again, and on my way back I realised it was Thursday, i.e. late opening day in Geneva, so I went along the fancy shopping street looking for stuff. However, it then started to snow quite heavily, so I took refuge in Globus and came out with a nice looking bottle of wine, before getting the tram to Planpalais so I could pick up a Mike Wong takeaway on my way home. After I tried to request a beef noodle soup with no coriander and extra chili in French, and just about succeeded, she then said "eat here or to go?" I felt silly. It was delicious though, I am slurping my way through the last dregs as I write this.

Rich is coming out tomorrow, until Tuesday - I am not 100% sure what to do with him. The main problem is tomorrow night, when I am meeting my cousins in Lausanne for the evening (they have been let off their strict Swiss reins for the night), and I could probably bring him along but no other people (he has met them before after all), but he may wish to stay in Geneva with the other people we know - I think the best way to deal with this may be just to ask him.

Making a start & a horrible meal.

08/03 - After the last post, I succeeded in staying at CERN until about 6, when I fled and moped about at home - the most interesting thing that happened was that I managed to eat three thin steaks for dinner, two sliced up in a bowl of noodles, and one just fried, topped with comté and grilled. Delicious.

09/03 - Yesterday I started off with a lecture on dark matter. This has nothing to do with anything I have ever studied, but Teresa recommended it as being an interesting course, so I went along and she was proved right. The speaker, Michael S. Turner, was really animated and almost managed to make me care about cosmology. After a very short lunch I had a pretty good meeting with Teresa in which we figured out what I don't know (loads) and what I need to know (almost as much). I got in contact with Ben, a senior guy in my group, and I was assigned some work to do for a note he's writing - could even get my name on the author list, which would be good. I left just in time to get to Migros, where I bought bananas, beef & socks, and a few bits and pieces which somehow came to CHF 48 - I honestly have no idea what I bought. I also got some cheap wine and beer from Denner, as I figured it's always good to have in the house.

The beef became part of a disastrous beef satay, as I couldn't be arsed to marinate I just kind of tossed everything in, which resulted in me feeling rather ill. Oddly, even though this is only the second day I haven't gone out or seen anyone, I already feel like I am becoming a recluse.

An abridged account of the weekend

05/03 - This was a bit of a nonsense day. I got in early to prepare some questions in time for my meeting at half 11. at 10 I got a message postponing the meeting to early afternoon, by which point I would already be en route to England. I composed the questions and sent them anyway, hoping to persuade them to talk about me in my absence and maybe even come up with something for me to actually do as part of the group. In light of my early departure I skipped lunch, a decision I cam to regret soon after - I got the Y bus at half one, and as always made it through to my gate very quickly and was waiting in the departure lounge for an hour - I am going to begin cutting these things finer. My lunch ended up being an extortionate & tiny delice de Gruyère followed by an identical one on the plane - it's just a cheese roll.

I arrived at Heathrow and rushed through arrivals, aiming to meet Kelly at Clapham Junction, to find her waiting at the door for me - she surprised me at Gatwick last time and had claimed she was going to the hairdresser today, but came all the way out here instead. Wonderful.

Le Weekend - I am going to simply write a very brief account of the weekend here, as this blog was intended to be an account of time spent away, not time at home. We went to my cousin's leaving do (she is moving to Nepal for a few months) in The Horse at Lambeth North, and had a great time there before Kelly and I went on to someone's (Guy's?) birthday in an ex-embassy near Hyde Park Corner - a bizarre venue for an awesome party. We are not sure what time we left, but I think it was a lot later than we thought (we both forgot that we had taken a taxi home until late the next day).

I had to get up to go to Kent for my Grandmother' 93rd birthday lunch, which was lovely. She liked the (unoriginal) Swiss chocolates I had brought her, and ended up with a huge bag of presents from her daughters and various grandchildren. I came back to London for a dinner party Kelly was throwing at our house, which consisted of amazing smoked salmon with horseradish and vodka cream, perfect beef bourgignon with a delicious salad and then cheese or Vienetta (yes!) for dessert. The last guests left around 2am, whereupon we cleared everything up - we have a dishwasher now, it's incredible - and went to bed. I counted in the morning, and the 10 of us got through a ridiculous amount of wine - at least 10 bottles, not including the 3 1/2 which went into the bourgignon.

Sunday was spent wandering the streets of Clapham South before settling down in a pub called the Draft Room for a 'pint of thirds' - three 1/3 pint glasses, each with a different interesting beer. In the evening we went to my friend Tom's house for a dumpling dinner - all three courses were dumpling based, and incredible dense and filling. I managed 8, Kelly three and a half. Come Monday morning I still felt like I was full of delicious boulders.

08/03 - This morning I was out of the house by half 6, starting a 5 hour journey back to CERN. There were no seats on the tube so I stood and tried not to fall asleep on my way to Bank. Once I got there I got on the DLR, which I still find a bit exciting - on the way out to London City Airport you go past so much interesting stuff, parts of London I would never usually encounter - it was dawn when I left the house, and everything was bathed in a very clear, crisp light which made it look amazing. London City is an odd place, I was told it was small but it seemed more like a train station than an airport. There were no queues, and when I was made to take my hat off before going through the metal detectors, my hair tumbled out and I was taken aside for a search. A brief rummage later, the lady shouted "yep, there is a cake in there!" to her colleague, and I was let through. I bumped into Anna, a girl from UCL who I did physics with, who was going to Zermatt for a conference on cantilevers (?), during which they had from 0930 to 1700 free for skiing. Sounds like a good conference. On the plane I was asleep before takeoff, missing the free food and coffee for which I had paid the extra money to fly Swiss instead of Easyjet. Bugger. I think it was still worth it though, the chairs in our little 100 seat plane were really comfortable, the plane was half empty, and there were no screaming children either.

When I arrived in Geneva I found I had just missed the half hourly direct bus to CERN, so I had to get bus-tram-bus which probably took me half an hour longer than it otherwise would, but it was too cold to wait outside. Never mind, when I got in I went straight to lunch and had a massive seafood risotto - in spite of the subsequent ristretto, I am now on the verge of falling asleep at my desk. I think today will be a long day.

A brief account of Tuesday to Thursday - masterclasses, steak and rice.

02/03 - There are two reasons to keep this brief - firstly not much happened, and secondly I have forgotten most of it anyway. I am unsure what happened during the day on Tuesday, all I wrote down was "work, lunch, false alarm on work", whatever that might mean. In the afternoon I moderated another International Physics Masterclass with a chap called Marco. They were a lot less responsive than the groups we had last week, and I found myself leaving him to do a lot of the talking. There were some excruciating silences, which he didn't seem to mind, and afterwards I met james and Dan for dinner - James had never been to L'Entrecôte, the first place I ever went for dinner in Geneva. We treated ourselves to wine and dessert, and each of us came out CHF 65 poorer but it was delicious, as always. The wine was great even though it was the cheapest, and the cheese platter was amazing. Afterwards we came back to my flat, as I had beer, and watched a couple of episodes of Black Books on youtube before I kicked them out.

03/03 - Oops, today I slept through/turned off and ignored all of my alarms (multiple alarms on each of two phones and my iPod, placed all over the flat) and slept for two hours longer than I had intended. This was not a massive disaster, as I had no meetings and nothing in particular to go in for, so I worked from home. Also I built the other set of IKEA shelves I got the other week, which are standing proud next to me as I type this, in all their low quality plain wood glory. In the evening I received a few emails from Dan and James - some fellow named Lee has returned to CVERN after an absence god-knows-where, and consequently most of the normal takers for Dan's pizza and film combo are out welcoming him back, so instead we cooked dinner (well, they shared, I didn't know what was going on so I made Nasi Goreng) and watched Terminator 2 just the three of us. It was awesome. After watching Terminator last week I was already looking forward to it, and it was even better than I remembered. I mean, the effects have come on such a long way from T1, Robert Patrick is a pretty menacing bad guy, and the soundtrack? There are only three songs in the entire film - bad to the bone, you could be mine (G 'n' R) and guitars, cadillacs. Awesome.

04/03 - I made it in fairly early today, having solved yesterday's problem - if I put one of my phones in the bath, I am far more likely to have a shower and actually get up. Hopefully this will be a key weapon in my battle against my morning self. I had a pretty productive day, mainly because I went for a coffee with Teresa, my designated stand-in supervisor. I mean, it's been a month and I am not too sure what I am meant to be doing, just heading in various directions without a clear goal. I told her this and she was rather surprised, assuming I had been studious and organised all this time, but she was also very sympathetic and said she'd help me to direct my efforts towards something that might one day become a thesis. Phew.

I had another masterclass this evening, with Marco again. It was much better, mainly because the schools connected were much chattier and asked much better questions than last time, especially the American one - for example will we destroy anything (no), are there any ill effects to the surroundings from the LHC (no), what is our average work day (officially 40 hours a week but really just however much time it takes to get the work done - I let Marco answer that one), and what is the proportion of females to males at CERN (15%, and that's being generous).

I ended up staying until half 7 this evening (that's a 9.5 hour day, hopefully that makes up for yesterday a bit) before coming home and cooking a leftover special, which was mainly tomato, garlic, onions, some kind of spicy French sausage (not in the slightest bit spicy) with the rest of yesterday's rice. Also I just listened to the entirety of NOW 13, the finest songs 1988 had to offer. Wonderful. I am going back to England tomorrow, in just 15 hours I will be packing up and sneaking off, and I am looking forward to it immensely.

Sunday with Kelly and a sleepy Monday

28/02 - Kelly and I were up pretty late today, as we had nothing planned whatsoever. We walked down to the old town and went up the cathedral, which gave us some awesome views of the (somewhat overcast) city.

Lac Leman from the top of the cathedral

Our aim for the day was to find some lunch and take a boat across the lake, both of which we achieved - I was quite keen on fondue, Kelly less so - I took us out to Bains Des Pâquis anyway, where I had my best fondue so far, on the pretence that they would have other things and I could have a fondue for one. As it turned out, this was half true - they only serve fondue in the evenings, so we ended up sharing pumpkin soup with some cheeses, some viande sechée with pickles and some delicious terrine, all washed down with some casselas wine. I'm not entirely sure if that's what it was called, but it was a Swiss white, it was the cheapest and it was good. All this set us back €18 (I had forgotten to get any francs earlier) which is a bargain for Geneva. On our walk back there was a crazy rainstorm, so the walk quickly became a bus ride.

Cheap and delicious lunch

In the evening we hung out at the flat and got hold of a couple of films to watch. Kelly had cereal for dinner (her choice) and immediately felt rather ill again, so after I fussed over her a bit we settled down on the sofa and put on her choice, The Road. This was a terrible idea - incredibly bleak, full of death and dark flashbacks - we got as far as the point where they find a basement and are attacked by emaciated naked apocalypse survivors (who were being farmed for meat by cannibals) before Kelly shouted "goldfish princess!" from under the duvet. This slightly odd exclamation referred to my choice of film, the studio Ghibli film Ponyo, an animated film which is vaguely based on The Little Mermaid, but cuter and set in Japan. This film is, as far as I can tell, the opposite of The Road, and went some way to undoing the damage caused by the previous film, although we both had to make a conscious effort not to think about the last image we saw before I turned the latter off.

01/03 - Kelly had to be up at 0445 to make her 7 o'clock flight, so I walked her downstairs in spite of her protests, but then went back to bed for a long time. A little too long in fact, in that I overslept enormously, but somehow I managed to blag my way through my meetings - the first of which I was the only person to connect from CERN, so I had to take notes and that made me feel productive. I left just in time to get the bus to Forumeyrin in order to make the supermarket before it closed at 7. The fruits of this were a steak sandwich (sunflower seed bread, café de paris butter, rare entrecôte, grated comté, another steak layer, another cheese layer, more butter and bread) which was amazing, and finished off my day. I miss Kelly a lot more today than I did last time we parted, probably because now she's been in the flat it feels empty without her.

CTF3, Fondue, my worst Swiss hangover and Kelly's arrival

25/02 - Oops, I nearly missed this day out. I took a tour of the Clic Test Facility (CTF3) with Tina, Rob & Tim, guided by Max. It was pretty cool, good to see inside some actual machinery rather than just messing around on computers. I took a load of photos which may or may not turn out to be any good - they were mostly of massive 2 ton magnets, so I think they may be of limited interest to the viewing public. In the evening we (most of the Royal Holloway and Sussex people) went out to Café De Soleil for dinner. Much like last night, 9/11 people had the fondue, along with a bit much white wine. I was sitting at one end of the table with Max, John & Matt Tamsett, definitely the biggest (or at least hungriest) four people. We wolfed down our fondue, stole some of Dan and Tim's, had more than our share of wine and generally did rather well out of the whole thing. One downside to Café De Soleil over Bains Des Paquis is that it's a lot pricier - twice as much in fact, as it cost us a whopping CHF50 (£31), nearly twice what we paid last time.

After dinner a few of us (i.e. all except Ricardo) went on to Pickwick's pub, a massive British pub which was hosting the CERN and ERASMUS mixer. We cornered a table and very definitely did no mixing. Matt got me involved in a 4 person round, so I was compelled to stay for 4 pints, which is about 3 more than I had planned - consequently Dan and I didn't leave until about half 12, walked to Gare Cornavin in the pouring rain, waited ages in the aforementioned rain for a bus that never came (our fault, misread the timetable) and then walked home (a total of 3 km) in the same sodding rain, arriving home around 2.

26/02 - Eugh. what an awful morning. My hangover knew no bounds, and I just about made it in before 11, having a meeting at half past. During this meeting I was the only one present from CERN and everyone seemed to be having a go at me. I was somehow responsible for the poor AV setup (I was using the mic built into my laptop, which has been perfectly adequate in the past) and criticised for not having decent videoconferencing equipment. It did not seem to matter that I do not have access to the contents of the cupboard, did not know what to get even if I did, and was struggling to hold my brain inside my head with the heels of my hands. At one point I got so furious at the chap telling me off that I very nearly told him to fuck off and slammed my computer shut, but thought better of it and just got my headphones out, which seemed to shut him up.

Still rather spaced out, I made the odd choice of salmon tartare and chips for lunch, and after drinking all the coffee I could manage and trying to work for a while I came to the conclusion that my mind was utterly incapable of useful thought so I left a little early to get stuff for mine and Kelly's dinner. As I was not capable of planning ahead I ended up going to the Coop at Forumeyrin for some things, Manor in the centre of Geneva for a specific wine and some things I had forgotten, and then to the Coop near my house for all the other things I remembered after that. There is currently an air traffic controllers' strike in France, which led to the cancellation of various flights back to the UK, and caused Kelly's plane to be delayed by an hour or so - this gave me plenty of time to cook our dinner and get to the airport, where I saw that Kelly had met Sam's girlfriend Verity on the way. She saw her in the airport and called out to her, but then realised that she only recognised her because she had seen loads of pictures of her on facebook, rather than because they had met in real life. In a clear misuse of CERN resources I had printed out "KELLY!!" in size 200 font, one letter per A4 page, and held this up as they came through the gates - Sam did not have a banner, I apologised for making him look bad.

When we got home I managed to finish off dinner in about 2 minutes - it was merguez sausages and grilled vine tomatoes on olive & sunflower toast with café de paris butter, with a rocket, grape, goats' cheese and avocado salad. Awesome.

A thoroughly pleasant Saturday

27/02 - This morning I popped down to the tea-room/boulangerie opposite my flat and got a selection of tasty treats for us. After breakfast we were picked up by Zack and Masa, who asked us for dinner last night but asked us to come to Annecy with them instead when we said we couldn't make it. We wandered around the (beautiful) town for a while, looking at antiques and avoiding the carnival folk - there were richly costumed and decidedly dour people wandering around the town posing for photos, generally creating the least carnival atmosphere I have ever encountered. After much searching we found somewhere for lunch, a little place by the old jail which sold sausages (all Masa wanted - she is 8 months pregnant, so she can demand whatever she wishes). These sausages were later thrown at me as the waitress tripped over, throwing a dish of diot and onion gravy over the table, the floor, my camera bag but not over me, incredibly. Annecy is famed for its antiques and curios market, but we returned with mainly wine and meat. Oh, I also discovered the most exciting vegetable I have ever seen, the Romanesco Broccoli. I stood and looked at it for ages, long after everyone else had lost interest.

Romanesco Broccoli

We stopped by a Carrefour on our way back to take advantage of the half price goods (compared to Switzerland), where I discovered that skidding along on the back of the trolley is just as fun for UN employees in their 30s & CERN physicists in their 20s as it is for children. I mean, I never doubted this, but it was good to have it confirmed.

We got back at 6 o'clock, and after hanging out, having a dinner of various delicious things (mainly cheeses and dried meats) and generally relaxing we realised it was 10 o'clock all of a sudden, so we walked to Café Bizarre where Ailsa was having a birthday celebration. We got there, planted ourselves at the bar and occasionally grabbed a passer by to chat to. when we grabbed Dan he seemed slightly distant - I put this down to his having just finished an 8 hour shift in the control room, but Kelly decided he was 'on the prowl'. Hmm. We walked back home through the old town, which impressed Kelly quite a bit - I suppose this city is pretty beautiful if you look at it in the right way.

Imaginary insult, crap pizza and good ravioli

24/02 - I am struggling a little to recall the events of yesterday. I know I went to a couple of talks in the morning, and I went for lunch with Matt Tamsett and a few other RHUL people and had a soggy and disappointing pizza. The afternoon trundled along, and I discovered that Tanya was having a birthday meal at La Trattoria in town. At first I felt a little insulted that I hadn't been invited, but then I saw the email which was sent to about 30 people, and realised that as I am new here noone knows my email address yet. At 6 I went down to R1 to have a drink and see if there was anyone I knew down there, and soon after my arrival Tanya and Paul arrived with a massive home made Tiramisu (courtesy of Paul) and a big tarte au citron, both of which were delicious. Dinner was a bit of a faff, as she had booked a table for 20 and more than 25 people turned up, so a lot of squashing and rearranging was done, but we all fitted in.

Out of our table of 15 people, 11 rather predictably had the penne siciliana - fast becoming the national dish of Geneva in my mind. I had gorgonzola ravioli, which was delicious and rich but rather full of spinach. Tanya seemed to have a great time, they were all going on to La Galerie (a student-run/squat bar round the corner which I have been informed does very cheap drinks, as all the staff are volunteers) but I instead opted to pop home - it was 10pm, and I had a few dull things to do (again). I opted to do it tonight as I have fondue tomorrow with a few people, and I have no idea when it will finish - also I am getting even worse at getting up in the morning after drinking.

When I got back I talked to Kelly and found that she was still ill - she and Ed had been to some of our friends' house for dinner, and Kelly had to have a lie down then get a taxi home, which sucks. I hope she's better by the weekend. I don't mind looking after her or anything, it just seems a pity to get a flight in order to be internationally unwell. I'll try to take it easy on the rich foods while she's here, but I'm not sure how feasible that is, as I don't have an oven and everywhere seems to either serve massive italian dishes, fondue, tartiflette or steak. Oh, I looked up the ingredients of tartiflette and they are as follows: Vacherin cheese, Gruyère cheese, single cream, bacon and sliced potatoes. Why aren't more Swiss people enormously fat?

ATLAS Shadow Shift & A frustrating day

22/02 - I got in today about 11, which I felt was justified as I have to stay until 11 as well. I write this sitting in the ATLAS control room, 5 hours into my first shadow shift. This involves sitting with the normal shifter and watching what he does, occasionally doing it myself. It mainly consists of checklists which tell you what to look for and what to do if it looks a bit wrong. The problem is, 'a bit wrong' is quite a vague criterion on which to judge various complex histograms. There is a webcam, which I think is public, which one can view here which is only available to CERN members. It's not very exciting anyway, but you can see where I sit - in the closest set of desks, at the furthest one away. I think we are doing OK, I have done some checklists and been a bit bewildered by how involved the guys next to me are in their shift (a different desk, I might add). I popped over to the office earlier and went via the fire escape on the side of the building (not really via as such, as the control room is on the ground floor). I wanted to get some better views of the mountains, it was particularly clear today and they looked amazing, however the problem with CERN is that wherever you are there are always power lines in the way, somewhat marring all the nice scenery that surrounds you.

Well, 6 hours in and not much has changed. I had the rest of that penne siciliana from Friday for breakfast, the one which I was very ill soon after eating the first time. Call it an experiment. I ate my beef, parmesan & rocket focaccia, supposedly my dinner, at about 4pm and I am now trying to put off eating my bagel for as long as possible, but I don't think I can hold out much longer. In fact, writing about the other foods has made me far hungrier, so I'm giving in now. Delicious. Snacking, blogging and househunting are the main activities at my desk at the moment, not much physics afoot.

7 hours down, I have devoured everything I brought with me and I am all out of stuff to do. I have helped my sister fix her sink, given sympathy to a poorly Kelly, downloaded games for my iPod, figured out how much I am spending out here (less than in London and decreasing week by week, amazingly - even with £100 shopping and skiing trips - goes to show how much I spend on going out back home, I suppose) and taken a few pictures. Short of actually doing some work, I am all out of ideas.

Well, nothing much else happened for the last hour. I packed up and ran for the 2310 bus, made it, and then proceeded to miss various connections and got home at about half past midnight. I called Kelly (who was still very ill), made come slightly unpleasant spicy noodles and went to bed.

23/02 - Well today just feels like it's been a bit of a waste. This morning some alarms went off, some alarms were ignored, and by the time I was up and about it was so late I decided I might as well have lunch en route to CERN to avoid wasting any more time. I headed down to Planpalais (about a 15 minute walk from my flat), figuring that I would drop off the IKEA money at Zack's house, grab a sandwich and hop on the number 14 tram, thereby saving myself the hassle of getting the bus then changing. This didn't quite work out - I did drop off the money, but as all the sandwiches I saw looked really unappetising I went to Mike Wong's for lunch - it's an Asian fast food restaurant right next to McDonalds. See the logo below for the reason why this proximity is important.

Anyway, the food was pretty good. They had beef panang, probably my favourite Thai dish, which I wolfed down pretty quickly. My journey to CERN didn't quite work out as quickly and efficiently as I had planned, as I ended up taking two trams and having to run through the pouring rain in between them. It is ATLAS week at CERN, which means there are lots of meetings going on in the rather grand main auditorium. I met someone to discuss what I should do in the masterclass I am moderating tomorrow, before realising I am actually doing it with Dan, not her, after we had already discussed a strategy. What a waste of time. I attended a couple of talks I didn't follow, pressed the wrong button on the coffee machine which meant that it tried to fit a big coffee into an espresso cup, minced around in the afternoon trying to sort out my shifts and some dull admin stuff, before meeting some people in R1 for a drink. I was persuaded to go and play pool with them, but for some reason just before we were about to leave I suddenly felt like it was a terrible idea and I fled to the bus, making it home in 45 minutes exactly, the fastest so far. Tonight my plan is to build some shelves and wash my hair. I am well rock 'n' roll.

Training, Snowsports, Dinner, Exhaustion & Chicken

19/02 - I had my second and third shift training sessions today, an hour earlier than I thought. I was happily pottering about the flat in my dressing gown when my laptop, phone and iPod all beeped in synchrony to inform me that I had precisely an hour before my training started. I dressed hurriedly and dashed for the bus, but had to make a stop along the way to buy a Swiss phone - I knew I wouldn't have another chance to get it before Monday, so I decided I would prefer to be 10 minutes late than spend another three days spending loads on every phone call. Incredibly, I think I only missed a couple of minutes, despite heading to the wrong room (again). The training was about as fun as the first session, the basic message that was communicated was that if anything untoward happened, we should just call the experts. That seems pretty easy. I had two training sessions as I have not yet decided which desk I want to work on, and I wanted to see which one seemed like the better choice - one desk involves just monitoring stuff and calling experts, the other requires the shifter to attempt to mitigate problems before calling in the experts. Sounds like more opportunities to make things worse to me, so I think I'll choose the former.

At beers the main chat was ski/snowboarding this weekend. I arranged to meet Jody and Ailsa at the bus stop at half 7 in the morning, and headed off to meet Dan and Clare (a friend of his from Canterbury) for dinner. I had decided a couple of days ago that I would switch from beer to wine after work, as it seemed like a much healthier, less bloaty option. Consequently after three glasses I fell off the bus on the way to meet Dan - luckily noone really saw and I was able to run to my tram with some dignity intact (or so I told myself). We went to L'Incontro, which Dan claimed had the best pasta he had ever tasted. It was good, and also enormous (penne siciliana for three gave us second helpings and a doggy bag), but I wasn't too blown away, for reasons which will become clear in a moment.

20/12 - I got an early night in preparation for my early start, and was awoken at 0310 by some loud noise from dowstairs. After this I found it impossible to get back to sleep, I was sick at about 4, and lay in bed wide awake for the 3 1/2 hours until my alarm went off. Still feeling pretty ill, I met the others at the bus stop and declared that I would use the bus ride to gauge my suitability for the day's activities. Thinking back now I am amazed that I bought the ticket and got on the coach to Flaine - I was exhausted, nauseous and having massive stomach cramps, but for some reason I thought I would be fine to chuck myself around in the snow, with a toilet nowhere in sight. On the coach I managed to get a window seat and the only spare seat on the entire coach - I refused to move for a lady who wanted to sit next to her friend, which I would usually have done in an instant, but my need was far greater than here at that moment.

On arrival in Flaine (fantastically ugly town, by the way) I went to hire a snowboard and sent Jody off to the pharmacy to buy me some Immodium, which he very kindly did. I scoffed them and told he and Ailsa to go ahead of me, do a couple of runs then I'd meet them back at the top. Unfortunately Flaine has a very different layout from the last place I went, as there is one big ski lift which goes up to 2420 m, then various long runs coming back down, making meeting up pretty tricky. As a result I was on my own for the entire morning, a little weak and even more uncoordinated than usual, falling all over the place and rapidly running out of energy. I was very grateful when I got a text from Ailsa at noon telling me she was having lunch at the bottom. On the upside, the Immodium seemed to work, so I assaulted my stomach with a croissant, ice tea, beef bourgignon and coke before heading back to the ski shop to swap my board for some skis - definitely the best decision of the day, even though I haven't been skiing since 1998 within 5 minutes I was on the phone while skiing, dealing with lifts, and heading down the mountain in zero visibility with none of the fear I would have felt on a board.

Flaine from above

I managed some turns, kept up with the experienced skiers on my second run, went a little off-piste and even did a couple of (accidental) moguls without any disaster. As much as it may disappoint Jody and the other snowboarders I think I'm going to stick to skis for a while. The bus ride back to Geneva wasn't ideal, as we were delayed by about half an hour stuck behind all the other buses trying to make it out of the mountains. I managed to get a little sleep in on the way, using my jacket as my pillow while Jody used my shoulder as his.

I had barely enough time for a shower before I had to rush off to Zack and Masa's for dinner, which was brilliant. They have an amazing flat just opposite La Comedie theatre, on the 6th floor with amazing views over the city. Dinner was a delicious salad of melon, mint, goats cheese and cucumber (maybe) with a freshly made sardine pâté, followed by a green pea and mint soup, then scallops with a jerusalem artichoke risotto and balsamic sauce, then a really dense cheesecake with raspberries. All this was accompanied by some great wines too - I have completely forgotten the names of the other dinner guests, two Croatians who have recently relocated from Zagreb to Lausanne, the husband works for Philip Morris and the wife is pregnant (as is Masa, by the way). I was called upon to explain the purpose of the LHC at one point, which I think went OK, although I'm not 100% sure of the factual accuracy of my description. After dinner Zack very kindly gave me (and the IKEA stuff they bought me on Tuesday) a lift back to my flat, a distance of about 900 metres. When I got in I had a chat with Simon back home, during which we worked out that I had been up for 37 out of the last 40 hours. I eventually got to sleep at about half past two, it was a very long day.

21/02 - I awoke to find a cloudless sky and a beautiful day, so I set out with two things in mind - try to take some good pictures, and buy a whole chicken from the food market down on Planpalais. I wandered down through the park and through all the stalls selling tat and shoddy kitchenware, before buying a small chicken with potatoes roasted underneath the rôtisserie in all the chicken fat. I was told last night that it was the best value lunch to be had in Geneva, and I think I agree - it came to CHF 13 (about £7.80) which is a bit less than my average lunch at CERN. I picked up a few low quality kitchen goods before going home, deboning the chicken and eating about half of it in one go with some curry mayonnaise - I am currently having a bit of a lie down after this effort. I am supposedly meeting Sam and Alex (two guys from home who moved out here around the same time as me) this afternoon for a drink, but I'm not too sure if I've got the energy...

Parc des Bastions

OK, turns out I did have the energy. I met Alex at Sam's , which is a ridiculous CHF 6000 a month flat in the old town, paid for by his company - we met Sam in Le Clemence, a bar just near where I met Zack and Masa on Monday night. It was nice seeing them, I'm glad they're here too - we were discussing the series of coincidences that have led us from leaving Wellington in 2002 to all ending up living within 10 minutes walk of each other in Geneva, all arriving in the space of three weeks. Oh, and I finished the whole chicken.

Meeting Zack, Short Films & iChat

16/02 - My journey to CERN was made far more pleasant than usual by the presence of some Gypsy buskers on my Tram, playing violin and accordion and generally making a dull grey day seem more exciting. My actual day passed largely without incident, consisting of two long meetings and a lunchbreak, whereas my evening was really good. I met Zack Taylor and his wife Masa for a drink - Zack is the son of a friend of my grandparents, and works out here for the UN development program. He's a very interesting guy, having done fieldwork in many countries, focussing on the Balkans especially Croatia (where he met Masa). We had some good in depth chats about a wide array of topics, generally ending in one or other of us vainly trying to link our two fields - international disarmament policy and particle physics have few areas in common. I am going for dinner with them on Saturday, and I'm looking forward to it immensely - I must admit to not really being myself at first, attempting to make a good impression and probably coming across a little twitchy and overeager. The wine was very good though, so I think I relaxed pretty quickly.

17/02 - I made it in rather earlier than usual today, intending to do a full day of work. However, about 11 o'clock Zack texted me asking what I wanted from IKEA, as he and Masa had very kindly offered to pick up some stuff for me while they were there. Consequently I spent rather a long time browsing the online catalogue for stuff rather than doing anything useful. Lunch was a delicious but bony Peking duck (as it is Chinese new year there is a different Chinese dish in R1 this week), and in the evening I had intended to go for a curry with Jody and a few others, but due to some confusion about leaving times I ended up going to Love Me Do's for pizza a gogo again, followed by The Terminator at Dan's flat.

18/02 - I had the first session of my shift training this morning, from 9-1030. I was 15 minutes late as I couldn't find the venue, and once I got there it was pretty dull. It was mostly an overview of what does what inside the ATLAS computing structure, and which bit we'd be dealing with. The rest of the day was pretty standard (satay beef for lunch, delicious), and in the evening I went over to The Globe with James to watch a few short films - we had missed the documentary session which was what I really wanted to see, so we made do with one of the fiction sessions. The films were interesting enough, I'm not going to bother going into detail about them now but my favourites were one about some Bedouins running out of sugar for their tea, and a Serbian film called L'age de la virginity which was about a future in which virginity was recognised as a (potentially fatal) disease, following one chap with a serious case during his visit to a Serbian virginity clinic, staffed by hot nurses of course.

When I got home I persuaded Hannah to get online with the google account I made her, purely so we could chat with Clare and Kelly at the same time. Not much important was said, but a lot of fun was had.

Valentine's weekend, my first return trip TO London.

12/02 - I got in early for my meeting, (having scoffed the last of Wednesday's chilli for breakfast) managed to fix my code and got it all working before I remembered that last week we decided not to bother with it, as too many people couldn't make it. Oh well, my mild panic made me do a bit more work, so no bad came of it. I went for lunch at restaurant 2 with Max, Kostye and Dan, where I ended up having a lamb kebab and couscous - the kebab was just a doner eaten with cutlery, not that delicious but very moreish. The afternoon dragged as I was waiting for 3 o'clock to arrive, when I fled to get the shuttle bus to the airport. My flight was at 1620, and I was already at the airport and waiting at the gate by 1540, incredibly fast really. The flight was unremarkable, and as I was speeding through the gates at Gatwick I was accosted by Kelly, who had lied to me and dashed off to Gatwick while I was waiting to board - it takes the same time to get to Gatwick from East Acton as it does from Geneva, it would appear. It felt great to be back in the UK, it was 10 degrees warmer than when I got on the plane, and I felt back at home immediately.

I will keep the account of the weekend brief, but suffice to say I enjoyed being back, I really like the new house (although it's not that new as Bob has lived there for 2 years and I've been round quite a lot), although there are a few things about it that need fixing.

When I got to our new house, I was allowed to do one job, which was fixing the bed - we have inherited Bob's single-and-a-half size bed, which he had been using like a cot since the slats fell through. This ended up taking ages, as a bracket or two were missing, and so I had to add some new ones, improvise a lot of bits and rely on nails and cable ties rather more heavily than I would have liked. Eventually it was fixed and sturdy, just in time for dinner. Kelly had bought Prosecco & smoked salmon, which we had before cooking the steaks - we had some amazing ones from Moen's, some prizewinning Scottish fillets that we rubbed in olive oil and peppercorns before serving with home-made garlicky chips. I was very pleased with all this, especially when the strawberry jelly dessert was served.

13/02 - Had a great day with Kelly, starting with a trip down to Northcote Road for breakfast en route to Portobello Road market, to see if there was anything we could get for the house. As it turns out there wasn't, we just had a good wander, ended up in a pub then went home for a nap before dinner. Dinner was at a place called Terroirs, a wine bar/restaurant just off the Strand. We had various delicious little courses, including duck rillettes, snails on garlic toast with parsley, massive prawns and tiny clams. The main reason to be there was the wine - they specialise in so-called 'natural' wines, of which I have heard mixed reviews. The one we had was nice, but had a slight aftertaste of cheap cider. The normal ones (a Jurançon, a Chenin Blanc and three others I can't remember the details of) were all great, and reasonable too - we ended up paying £2 less for the wine than we did on food.

14/02 - Having had our Valentine's day yesterday, today we spent most of the day eating or preparing to eat. Pancakes for breakfast were followed by a trip to ASDA to get stuff for dinner - a pork, beef and butternut squash lasagne. Clare and Simon came over for dinner, which was delicious with a ton of salad & followed by Vienetta, courtesy of Simon. During the cooking and eating process we must have got through 5 or 6 bottles of wine, after which we settled down to watch a film - due to some technical problems we couldn't get either the PS3 or DVD player to work, so we settled for X-men on TV, which none of us made it all the way through. I packed and we were in bed quite early, although I couldn't really sleep due to the rubbish heating - I could either swelter under two duvets or lie out in the cold and shiver.

15/02 - I had to be up at half five anyway, and I was at Clapham junction by 6, and at Gatwick by 0705. I was a little blasé about time, and after titting around on the internet for a bit I realised I wasn't quite so early as I thought, and I made it to the gates just as they opened for my flight. It was incredibly uncomfortable and I was in the aisle and unable to recline, so I only got about 10 minutes sleep on my way back to Geneva. I had some leftover lasagne which I ate with an inadequate fork, which was probably the only reason I had the energy to make it through the day. By the time I got to my desk it was 1145, meaning it took me 5 hours door-to-door this time, whereas it only took 4 and a half on the way out. I reckon that with slightly better planning and more confidence in my ability to sprint through airports I can cut that down to 4 hours - less if I didn't have to change terminals on that crappy bus at Gatwick. Also I am taking a pillow next time, easyjet hand baggage regulations be damned.

I did some mild coding in the morning, and I had a meeting at 3 which lasted until half four, but I spent most of the day blearily wandering round CERN either on my way to, or returning from, coffee. I left at half five, stunned that I made it until then, and had a chat about wind chill on the bus back with Arlo and Alex - I had heard them talking about "increased rate" and "cooling below ambient temperature" and I had assumed that they were talking about physics, but when I heard Arlo saying "try getting a wet towel..." I realised this wasn't the case. Dinner was a decidely less hearty affair than the past four nights (fondue, steak, lasagne) consisting as it did of a Gruyére toastie and some terrine de foie on brioche. OK, maybe it was quite fancy, but it was just what I had in the fridge/cupboard. I watched some winter olympics and had a chat with my Dad & I was wiped out and in bed by about half 9 (although, of course, I was messing around on the internet playing games until about 11).

Two slow days and Fondue

09/02 - Well today was rather a waste. I overslept, yet again, made little progress in doing any useful work, and adjourned myself to the Hypermarché/shopping centre at Balexert in another instalment of my fruitless quest for decent footwear to deal with all this snow & cold. Once again all the boots were horrible, but the giant Migros had loads of interesting european stuff, such as vacuum packed veal tongue and unidentifiable things in cans. I steered away from the tongue and ended up accidentally buying another CHF 150 worth of food, including lots of freezer stuff, a massive steak and some Café de Paris butter. As is the way with supermarkets here, I was ejected at 7pm and made my way home where I had the aforementioned steak and butter in a massive sandwich.

10/02 - Hmm - today was again rather uneventful, which is why I'm including 3 days in one post here. I had lunch with the Imperial guys (Paul, Arlo, Alex, Ravi & Mike) and spent the afternoon half working, half looking up flights. In the evening I got the bus with Dan, James and a few others who were going for the Pizza a gogo night, but I left them at Gare Cornavin and went on a little adventure with my camera, as it was just getting dark and the river/lake looked amazing. I ended up walking home, linking together a few places in my head along the way - this city really is rather small. Well, the centre is, I'm sure there's lots more to explore a little further afield, but I haven't got there yet. I went home and cooked myself a chilli, which was enormous and delicious, before going over to Dan's to watch a film. I arrived to find 10 people already watching No Country For Old Men, not The Godfather as was previously suggested, but a welcome substitution as it is a good hour shorter.

11/02 - Kelly rang me nice and early to ensure I would get up too, so I did so and made myself an enormous sandwich out of the leftover chilli before leaving the house. The weather forecast on the radio predicted that today it would be between -4 and -15 degrees, and even though I was wrapped up in 4 layers (including thermals) and my hat and gloves I was still freezing by the time I got to CERN. I had a late lunch of soup today, and I believe this may be the only way one can eat cheaply in Switzerland. The vegetable soup isn't too exciting on its own, but add the free parmesan, bread and tabasco and it's actually pretty good. More importantly, it is only CHF 1.20, making it cheaper than a cup of tea!

Unfortunately it is not that filling, as I discovered around 4 o'clock when my stomach started grumbling about its emptiness. I fended it off with fruit but this did not seem too effective, so I distracted myself with looking up French courses instead. At 5 I had my training course to be a moderator at the International Physics Masterclasses next week - this was essentially a run-through of a sample program, giving us some simple tips about how best to engage with the students, but it became an exercise in semantics, as the physicists around me picked apart the most petty and irrelevant aspects of the presentation instead of seeing the genuinely useful information we were being given. What an annoying bunch, I have been paired with a couple of them next week and I dread to think who I may have been paired with.

We caught a serendipitous lift with Max to the Royal Holloway dinner, which consisted of the six of us going for fondue at Bains de Paquis, a little place temporarily built over the changing rooms on a pier into the middle of the lake. As we were walking out over the exposed jetty, skidding on ice, the wind whipping down the lake & whistling through the masts, it dawned on me that this was probably the coldest I have ever been. I mean, most of me was warm, but my exposed face and fingers were incredibly cold - I was unable to breathe through my nose due to the stinging cold which felt like my brain was frosting up, and my fingers were numb within 200 metres. Once we reached the restaurant things improved, as Ricardo and Dan braved the cold once more to order our food from the little shack outside, and returned bearing wine. The fondue was awesome, we had tons of bread, dried meat, onions and a few cornichons to dip in it, and it went fast. I mean that the 6 of us demolished an enormous vat of cheese in a shade under 20 minutes, down to the last scraping. As we were so quick we went to Café des Arts for a drink and a chat before we went home - as is always the case with these things, there were some awkward moments in conversation where one could tell that we were, for the most part, colleagues rather than friends. I have certainly attended much less pleasant dinners though, and it went better than I expected, even if we were all done and on our way home by 10. Oh, while we were in Café des Arts Dan somehow managed to drink CHF 30 worth of whisky in the time it took me to drink one very small glass of wine - impressive, but not very frugal.

I came home and packed rather excitedly - I am looking forward to going home tomorrow enormously, Kelly has planned dinner already and limited the number of jobs I'm allowed to do - I can fix the bed and the internet and that's it (I'm going to try and fix the toilet flush while she's not looking). I am also looking forward to it not being so incredibly cold - I like the snow and ice, but not the biting wind that seems to come from all directions at once, making shelter impossible to find. I am not, however, looking forward to my meeting in 9 1/2 hours - I have been trying all week to rewrite a piece of code and make it simpler, but now it won't run and I can't get the results I said I would send last Monday. All this means that at my meeting in the morning I will have not proceeded in any way since last week, which is a bit frustrating. Also I will have to admit to this, which is rather more embarrassing.

Snowboarding & Bob's birthday dinner

07/02 - I was up at 7 and just about ready to leave when Paul and Tanya arrived to pick us up. Having hurriedly changed my trousers in the lobby, we were off to Les Contamines, a ski resort near Chamonix. The journey only took an hour, during which I was persuaded that I should snowboard with Tanya and the other people in her car, instead of skiing with the others. I hired some stuff when we got there and set off up the mountain in my turquoise trousers and entirely inappropriate jacket. Up at the top Arvinder and Jody offered to teach me for a bit, so I strapped in and we set off - first I was instructed how to do the 'falling leaf', gliding across the slope facing down it, then gliding back the other way. This went pretty well until I was instructed to try toe edge, which involved facing the other way - the problem was not moving like this but turning into it, which I simply could not do. I found it much easier to just go down switch, i.e. change which foot was my front foot. Consequently, after about 20 minutes my right foot was killing me, as it had been angled slightly the wrong way and so I was twisting the ankle every time I changed sides - after a lengthy descent (in which time the skiers had time to go down and up and down again) I adjusted the bindings and all was well. Jody and Arvinder very kindly accompanied me all morning apart from one run I did on my own just before lunch.

When I eventually found the others at the restaurant, I examined my hoody and found that the bottom foot of it was frozen solid, with an inch of hard packed snow on both the inside and the outside as I had been falling over so much. Lunch was a good hearty steak and chips with cheese sauce, which along with a beer made me realise quite how exhausted I was. Afterwards I smashed the snow off my hoody on the wall of the restaurant, stuffed it in a binbag and made my way down to the next lift, freezing cold. We had to get a button lift up for the next one, apparently the enemy of snowboarders as they are designed for people who go uphill facing forwards - I managed to get about 80% up before hitting a bump and crashing down in front of a small child who laughed at me. I couldn't get up the hill to try and get back on the the lift, and so my only option, given that we were short on time by this point, seemed to be to go through the powder onto the red run that the skiers/better snowboarders were taking. The effort of falling and getting back up again constantly soon warmed me up, and due to the layout of the resort I ended up doing a couple of red runs back down the mountain without any major incidents - not bad for my first day, I reckon. I had to be hurried along by Jody in order to get the last lift at half four - I got it at 16:28. I must admit to taking the lazy cablecar option back down to the car, along with the girls, while the others sped off and arrived about the same time as us. I got a lift with Paul this time, stuffed in the back with all the snowboards and skis. Within 2 minutes I realised quite how knackered and broken I was, as various aches and pains surfaced (which have not gone away as I write this on Tuesday).

When I got in I had a meal with my new housemates and my sister - or rather, I was connected via a Skype video link to Bob (and Georgie)'s Sunday dinner back in Clapham. I was given a party hat, like the one Bob is modelling below, and seated at one end of the table while Bob sat at the other. I had a rather sad bowl of pasta & pesto while at the other end they tucked into slow roasted pork belly, tiny birthday cakes and port - I could join in on the cheese course though. I am not sure if this will be happening every Sunday I'm away, but it was nice to see everyone (albeit grainily) and to sort-of-meet Sophie, the new girl in the house.

My first videoconference dinner.

08/02 - I awoke on Monday barely able to move, switched off seven alarms and still arrived late. I learnt some more about what I will actually be doing out here, and ended up staying far later than I intended because our 5pm meeting was delayed by an hour, meaning I didn't make it down to R1 until 7. My various supermarket and quiz plans were therefore in jeopardy, but this wasn't too much of a problem, as I decided to sack off the pub quiz and instead go for dinner with James, Paul & Mike (from yesterday) and Arlo and Alex (from Friday night). We went to La Trattoria, a restaurant which I assume is a popular choice as its number is inscribed on the wall of my office. I had an enormous platter of penne which I barely finished, and stumbled off to the bus, where James and I had a somewhat depressing discussion about reasons why the government should fund continue to fund particle physics, and our own personal motivations for what we're doing. I should add that James had been part of a group showing the provost of UCL around today - he is a vice-chancellor of the UK funding council or something, and was out here to see what the money the UK pays actually produces at CERN. Consequently he had had quite a few beers with UCL academics before coming for dinner, and was in a rather more reflective mood than usual.

An undeserved hangover

05/02 - At 6 I went down to R1 to meet some people for beers, only to find that there was noone I knew there at all. Eventually some other people joined me, and a plan was hashed out - Jody was to lead us to a falafel place near Gare Cornavin, and then we would join two Irish guys (Dermot and Steve, I think) on a little pub crawl round Planpalais. I nipped home to drop my stuff off and avoided the falafel, picking up Dan on the way to meet Jody again - on our arrival we were led around the block by the Irish guys who, it transpired, had no idea where we were going. We eventually settled on a pub called L'Elephant Dans La Cannette, a studenty place which sold Delirium Tremens, a 10% Belgian beer which is named after an "acute episode of delirium that is usually caused by withdrawal from alcohol". I had a normal pint and one of those before deciding grumpily that I was tired and wasn't having much fun, so I ditched and headed home.

On my arrival back at the flat I heard some commotion coming from one of the windows - I recognised Arlo, a chap I met at summer school, and shouted to him. He told me to come up to studio 13, where I found a load of people I knew getting ready for a night out at Club Platinum, some swanky expensive place. I was given a vodka and coke and Tanya regaled her friend Mike with the tale of how the girls at summer school had decided that I was one of the most attractive people there - quite what he was meant to make of this I don't know, it was rather embarrassing and she eventually stopped when I pointed this out. I learnt that they were all planning to go skiing on Sunday at Les Contamines, which is perfect for a beginner like me, so I asked one of them to let me know when they were going and I'd get the bus. They dashed off to the club, while I went to bed despite their best efforts to get me to come along.

06/02 - Now, when I got upstairs the incredibly strong vodka kicked in, and I found myself getting increasingly drunk while in bed, meaning I ended up not sleeping until about 5, and waking up at 8 with an enormous headache and no painkillers in the house. I hid under the duvet until 1, when I felt ready to face the world - after searching in vain for my laundry card for half an hour, I walked to Rive to buy some boots, which was ultimately a fruitless mission. Instead I walked along the lake and ended up in Manor, the massive department store, where I blew CHF 50 on wines and treats (and loo roll, less glamourous).

When I got home I talked to Jody and found that Paul and co. had saved me a place in their car, and would be coming to pick me up at 0740 in the morning! Very generous of them, I'm very pleased I don't have to get the bus up there, this'll be much better (as long as they can put up with me being a total beginner). I should probably eat and go to bed soon, as it's 10 and I have to be up at half 6 or so.

Is there anybody here? & accidental horse

04/02 - I met Dan and some of the other UK people for a beer at 6, informed James of this and he promptly hopped off the bus (he was already on his way home), walked back and joined us. In retrospect this was a little pointless, as we then had one drink and went and got the bus anyway - Dan stayed behind to do some work, but within 15 minutes had sent us both the following text message:

I quickly realised I can't be fucked with all this. Give me a text when you guys have finished dinner and I'll come meet you for a walk.

James and I had planned to while away the evening exploring the Old Town (left). After dinner (nasi goreng with all the leftover rice from Tuesday, yum) we set out as far as the cathedral and at each turning we would spin a bottle to choose which direction to go. Unfortunately, due to the fact we didn't want to (a) leave the Old Town and (b) didn't want to go down any obviously empty streets, we mostly overruled the bottle's decision. It wasn't long before it dawned on me that Geneva's Old Town is a very small region, made up mostly of the Cathedral and roads that lead to the Cathedral. In the end we stopped at a place called Le Roi Ubu, which looked cool enough until we saw the prices - my 100ml of red wine was £3, which in retrospect wasn't actually that bad. James' beer was nearly £6, although it was also 9% so at least he got his money's worth. By the time we had had a couple it was almost 11 and I was (unjustifiably) knackered, so we walked back home via a few nice viewpoints and the like. I am convinced that this city must hold some exciting and interesting bars, hidden away somewhere, I am just not altogether sure how to find them.

05/02 - A rushed and exceedingly rainy morning got me in for my morning meeting, where I was quizzed about plans and progress. By emphasising the former and asking questions instead of speaking about the latter, I think I came out of it pretty well, albeit with a full (and slightly intimidating) to do list. At lunch I hurried to the steak frites section of Restaurant 1, as my morning banana had been woefully ineffective at staving off hunger until now (2pm). However, I made a mistake - due to a stack of plates in front of the sign, what I read as steak de choix (steak how you like it) was actually steak de cheval (slab of rare horse). I realised this after I had added mayonnaise to my chips and chilli to my meat, so I was in no position to exchange my meal for another and found a seat. I was on my own again initially, but I was swiftly joined my Matilde and Elisa, two friends from London. This would have made me happy if it weren't for the fact that Matilde had a beef steak - I can only assume there was a rush on horse and they had to make do. It wasn't actually that bad, as long as I concentrated on the sauces and not the somewhat sinewy texture.

I attended my first on-site meeting today, the meeting of the Top X-section group. I followed a little of what they said, but quickly snuck out after my relevant talks to go and meet Joe (a chap I met ages ago in Oxford and have seen a few times since) in R1. After my bout of sadness yesterday lunchtime I got chatting to a few people about what I needed for winter sports this weekend, and Joe offered to lend me some snowboarding trousers while James said I could have his goggles. Joe wasn't there, but I chatted to some people who are going skiing tomorrow and they advised me that the resort they have chosen (Argentière) really isn't good for beginners, so I may not need all the gear anyway (very kind of them though - the trousers are a rather fetching turquoise). Whether or not I go tomorrow is an important decision for a few reasons:

1. If I don't go I will be able to go out tonight (if there's anywhere to go out to)
2. I need to do some skiing before Kelly gets here in March, as she will have just spent a week skiing and I don't want to be shown up
3. If I go then I will only have Sunday to look round Geneva (if you remember from my previous post, almost everything in Geneva is shut on Sunday and I really need to buy some stuff - my 7 year old Nike Hi-tops aren't holding up too well in the snow and rain)

Oh, one more thing - I wrote most of this entry sitting on a broken office chair amongst a pile of rubbish outside the lift in my building. This is because I left my keys in my coat pocket when I went to my meeting and then everyone left and locked the office.

First days at work

03/02 - Unsurprisingly, I overslept today (I blame the entirely opaque shutters on the windows), but found that James was still at home too, so we went in together in time for early lunch. I think the lunch at 12, coffee at 4 and beers at 6 routine may be a bit much unless one gets in before 9, which I can't see myself doing that very often (by which I mean ever), but I'm willing to adhere to it until I actually know what I'm meant to be doing - on Monday I learnt a little about what is expected of us in order to gain authorship, i.e. be classed as having been a useful member of the collaboration during our time here. Apparently we have to do 'service work' for 50% of our one year attachment - as I am only out for 6 months it means all of my time here. This has to be split between doing shifts (sitting in the control room of the experiment watching screens and telling someone if something goes wrong) and other stuff which is basically all the annoying tasks noone more senior fancies doing. However, all this seems quite flexible, and some people have done all of it already while others have done none, so I'm not going to worry too much.

I made the wise decision to skip 4 o'clock coffee so I could actually get something useful done, but I fled at half five to get the bus back to town in order to get to Love Me Dos in time for the happy hour - this is 15 CHF for 'pizza-go-go', a beer and an ice cream, which is probably the best value meal one can have in Geneva. This was followed by Back To The Future III at the Haydenplex, (i.e. in Dan's flat). I have not watched any of the trilogy as a Physicist, or indeed in the company of Physicists, and I think I got a lot more out of it this time around - most of the science in the film is a little dodgy, but this time round I understood why this was the case and enjoyed the film all the more. I think. I was confused by the dynamics between the other people there (Amy, Jody and Gemma), all of whom seem to have been here for ages. It feels strange being here as an interloper, situating myself in the middle of their established lives, drinking their beer, assuming nobody minds and hoping that I'll just fit in somehow.

04/02 - This feeling of not quite fitting in was made all the stronger today at lunch. I arrived a few minutes before the allotted time of noon, grabbed a massive plate of 'haunch of veal' and sat down at an empty table. Before too long a few people I sort of knew started filing in, and all of them joined a man I didn't recognise sitting directly behind me. I was left in the position of being at the next table to the UK people, having nearly finished my lunch and not quite knowing anyone well enough to turn around and get them all to move so I could join them. Never mind, I only had to endure this for a few short minutes before heading back to work. I think tonight might be the first day with no plan for going out, which I shall take as a welcome opportunity to explore the Old Town, and see if I can find anything worth doing (if anything is still open by the time I get back, that is). Another quandary I must face is whether to go Skiiing, Snowboarding or indeed go to the mountains at all this weekend. Simon (the chap who moved teams for me at the quiz) is going up with his brother and a few others in a car this weekend, but neither Dan nor James are going so I must, alas, start the process of making new friends who can tell me where to go, what I'll need and where to get it all. I am going to start this process at beers at 6 this evening.

Incidentally, I realise that the lunch table incident is not indicative of any particular loathing or contempt for me by anyone, and I didn't have a burning desire to join in with the conversation in progress, it is just nice to eat with other people. Most of the time.

Also just before lunch I thought I recognised someone (an American girl named Vicki who I have met a few times at conferences etc.) but got no recognition in return. Realising I was wearing a hat and that my hair is rather a distinguishing feature, I took it off and greeted her cheerily - the reply had an unexpected strong German accent, and she adopted that vacant, confused and searching look that I know I must do when approached by a stranger who seems to know me. Oops.

2 days in, no work done...

01/02 - The first day was very much as I predicted - got in in time for coffee at 4, having posted my keys back to Ed (I packed them by accident). I met a few friends from England at coffee and agreed to partake in a pub quiz after beers at 6. I went and signed some papers in the liaison office and was given a preemptive noise warning (apparently the Swiss are very conservative and ), had a meeting at 5 where I didn't have to do anything except nod and occasionally contribute vague questions, then flee to beers at 6 o'clock, where my potential fellow quizzers were. They fled to collect someone whose name I didn't catch, so I assumed I would meet them at the bus stop. I trudged through the 3 inches of snow that had fallen while I was indoors and hopped on the departing bus, only to realise there was noone I knew on it and that I would have to go home, google the pub, and dash there as fast as I could.

I ran/jogged to the pub from my flat, arriving at 8pm exactly to find a team of 6 (all of whom I had met before) and a team of 5 (all strangers) - Simon, a fellow I met on the Summer School, very kindly offered to switch so I could be on the team with people I knew. I felt rather childish about this, but accepted anyway. We didn't do that well in the quiz, coming 10th out of 14 and being beaten by the other CERN team (who came 6th and went on to win the bonus question jackpot!) but I seemed to impress with my quiz skills, as they insisted I be on their team again next week. On the way home I espied a set of shelves and some metal baskets on the next street over from my place, so I walked home with everyone else and then doubled back to collect them when they had gone inside - the shelves are a little rusty and have one wobbly wheel, but it wouldn't feel like home without at least one piece of knackered bin-furniture.

02/02 - Luker Bros. arrived with all my stuff at about half 9 in the morning. Having unloaded it all, I went down to investigate 'La Cave', to see where I could put my bike - it is a space in the basement in one of the creepiest rooms I have ever seen. There is a foot thick blast door leading to a concrete room filled with little slatted locked enclosures, each assigned to a different apartment in the building. Mine was about big enough for two coffins, I would say. I hung my bike on a hook and made my way out of there as soon as possible.

Most of the day was spent unpacking, I now have books on the shelves, clothes in the wardrobe, crockery in the cupboards, a wireless network and surround sound. I feel much more at home, all I need now is some drawers and a hatstand. Unpacking took the majority of the afternoon, after which I made an ultimately useless trip to the Apple Store and the coop, which shuts at seven (and this is considered late! This may take some getting used to).

I cooked Nasi Goreng for Dan and James, although I forgot to buy any eggs so we only had one between three, which was rather insufficient. Dan had booked himself onto a night shift from 11-7, so he ate and ran, whereas James and I watched Coraline (wierd, creepy but really enjoyable) and had a few beers. The kitchen is just big enough to cook in - I had to chop things on the dining table, and the rice cooker was on the floor next to the TV, but I think it'll be fine.

Oh, I forgot one more thing - I have attached some pictures of the flat as it was when I moved in, if anyone is interested.

...the kitchen,

...the bedroom,

...the view towards the mountains,

...and the living room (which is also the bedroom).

Thoughts on Geneva

I arrived here last night, having bid a heart-wrenching farewell to Ed, Clare and Kelly (my flatmate, sister and girlfriend respectively) at Gatwick. On the plane I was given a very welcome (and very strong) Bloody Mary which helped a little with the uprooting. On arrival in Geneva I was greeted by my colleague Dan who had my keys, and then invited me over to his for Sushi-making later in the evening - this was actually quite a lot of fun, and distracted me from missing home. I also managed to find somewhere that sold me some beers ("Nowhere is open on Sundays here, not even for beers!" said Dan and James) and watched Dr. Strangelove before bed.

So, today I have been to the coop supermarket, spent about £100 on stuff for my cupboards (which still look alarmingly bare) and wrestled with a woman from Royal Mail trying, unsuccessfully, to get my mail redirected to either (a) Kelly & Ed's house or (b) my new flat.

On the upside, it is a gorgeous sunny day, even though the temperature is apparently -1° outside. My flat, although small, has a wall of windows and an enormous bed, and could be a nice place to live once my stuff arrives. I have had some Ribena, a Bifi-roll and some sort of meaty oblong for lunch, and even managed to make a decent cup of tea, which is a good start.

I am now off to try and find my way to CERN for my first day - I'll get there around 3pm, I am meeting my friend Sarah for coffee at 4, I have a meeting at 5 with other people from my university, and then I'm meeting some others for beer at 6 - all in Restaurant 1, conveniently enough. Not the most strenuous of first days, granted.

Birthday Story

So, I have a birthday story to tell. It all started in Belgrade, where Ivan and myself met Milos and Jovana, our newfound Serbian friends, at 11 in an Irish pub just near Ivan's house. After we all got there, it was decided that as I had only a few minutes to go until my birthday, we should go back to Ivan's place and get as drunk as possible before midnight. We got in at 11:56, I drank as much of the various Serbo-croat brandies as I could, and then it turned midnight and I was presented with my birthday cake- a Jaffa Cake with a lighter stuck in it, with the gas button held down with a hairband so that the flame stayed on. Wonderful, and meant I could eat my entire birthday cake in one go. We chatted, drank and had an awesome time until about half five, when the others left and Ivan and I tucked into the leftover Pizza from earlier in the night.

The morning was horrible - we were up at half 10, and stumbled to the square to get the bus. When we got there, there was a bloke with a cab who was driving to the airport to pick someone up, and so was offering lifts for the same price as the bus- 200 Dinar, or about £2. Ivan and I discussed this as an option, and decided that it would be a more interesting way to get to the airport, and far less crowded than the bus. After I got in that cab, we drove around touting for more business for a while, then there was a thunk, the engine made a funny noise, and we had to pull over by a bus stop opposite a McDonalds, and wait for the airport bus anyway. The chap in the front of the car ("Sprechen sie Deutsch?" "Nein" "[well Matt, Im going to tell you what's wrong with the car in German anyway]") explained that the car had overheated, and needed water, I think. Anyway, the bus was there within a few minutes, and after a brief nap on the floor at the airport I used some of my remaining Dinar to buy a bottle of Vinjak, which I was looking forward to subjecting my friends to. On the flight I was looking forward immensely to some sort of breakfast, but instead I received a tiny pot of white chocolate ice cream. When I arrived in Zurich a couple of things happened - my hangover suddenly kicked in, I changed $20 into Swiss francs, and spent the equivalent of $15 (!!) on a burger king meal. I then realised the time, rushed through security, and found that apparently I am not permitted to take alcohol from outside the European Union onto the plane in my hand luggage. Due to the fact that I thought I had been clever, and had no check-in baggage, the only thing to do was to throw it away. Happy Birthday to me. The rest of the flight was alright, I just dozed, received a tiny and rubbish sandwich, arrived in Heathrow and missed my train by two minutes, meaning that I missed my connecting train home and had to wait another hour in London, all of which meant that I arrived home with about 45 minutes of my birthday remaining. Thank god I had a good start to the day.